Our Way Of Life...
In the news I’ve been seeing so many broadcast and blogs on the hot topic of butt injections, ie... THE BLACK MADAM
Well, it’s twenty years later since my first injections. I was a young and desperate trans girl longing to look and feel more like a true female. Hormones were just not enough, nor did they work as fast to get the changes and softness I as a young trans girl longed for. I remember Getting up on the first day of my injections, my girlfriend and I hopped on the Amtrak train to NYC for our first round of Silicone shots. It was like a birthday celebration to me. Anxiety and Excitement Enthralled me. Once in New York city, we hopped in a taxie and on to uptown and a more passable me we went. As we were buzzed in and Up the elevator into this well kept polished uptown apartment building, my girlfriend and I were welcomed into this very classy looking woman’s apartment . I remember getting up on her table, and it all beginning. It was like hell, I don’t know what I was thinking a silicone jab would actually feel like getting, but never in my wildest imagination did I think it would feel like hells fire up under my skin. The injections were followed by the second burn sensation of crazy glue as my lay nurse sealed off my fresh injection holes from leakage. On with the antiseptic spray and finally some sort of plastic wrap to protect my clothes for our train journey back home. Yes! It’s all over and I survived. The pain was like nothing I ever felt in my life, but once I looked into the mirror as I was putting back on my tights… it was like love at first sight. There I saw the beginning of the hips and buttocks I‘ve always dreamt. No more silhouette of a little boy’s body, that I wanted so much in my youth to commit suicide over. I was a girl now! The hips I new I was meant to have, were finally on their way . From that day forth getting silicone injections was a ritual in my Trans life every other Saturday just as normal as going to church every Sunday.
I am expressing these personal detail of my very private life as a transsexual woman , to allow you the reader into a transgender woman’s world for a better understanding of this thing we do that’s called “Pumping” aka “Sill” aka “ Getting Work” aka “The Candy“… it’s all about, “Our Way Of Life“.Whether you as an outsider think it’s a Bizarre or weird cure to a cheaper alternative main stream cosmetic body sculpting procedure. Pumping in most cases is the trans woman’s bridge between a life of Passing or a life of Torture, Ridicule and Self Hate by way of not passing while standing out to much as one looks too masculine in woman’s clothes. So please News Casters, Blogers and Main Stream people. Do not knock our way of making it in this Trans hostile world if your not willing to stand up for the Trans community and make changes to help open avenues to help trans woman get better medical care to help legally meet our needs of transitioning. Being able to get “pump” has aloud me and thousands of my trans sisters to live a beautiful normal life free from harassment in such a climate of trans hate by the ability to blend in better because of it.
Now I’m noticing that with these great results that can be obtained through years of perfecting the silicone body sculpting procedure via “getting pumped“, the idea of getting pumped has seemingly bled into the mainstream of genetic female Celebrities, Reality Stars, Strippers and the Common Woman seeking a better self image. Keep in mind, Ladies… with this comes the fact that we as trans woman all get up on the table knowing that something can go wrong. However, it’s a chance to us that’s well worth taking and with all knowledge that the person performing the procedure is not a formally trained doctor, but someone with knowledge of the procedure and has been informally trained through a word of mouth system that has gone on in the Trans community for more than 50 years. These lay practitioners are people willing to help Trans women achieve a better standard of life. Thus if something goes a stray during the procedure, it is well understood that they are to be fully excused of any wrong doing. Let it be known again that this is “our way of life” as the Trans woman and not to be taken as a “trend”. Trans women die from this procedure many times. However, it is a risk well worth taking for the life altering advantages and results, which could lead to a more passable and happy fulfilled life. So please remember why we the Trans Women do this. This is not just something we do for vanity. Getting pumped is a trans woman’s life line. So to our Genitic Female sister, so lucky to have been born in your right body and mind... if you chose to get on the table knowing the dangers of this procedure, you should fall under the same rules of engagement to getting pumped as the trans woman, as far as subjecting your lay doctor to the No Fault Clause if something goes a stray during this procedure… It’s our way of life!
God Bless Claudia Seye Aderotimi’ and the many other trans woman’s lives lost in this struggle of self image insecurities and may they rest in peace. However, what happen to these women was not malice or murder as the media so well puts it, it’s a situation that we the trans woman face everyday we decide to move more closer towards our full transition. Please don’t knock our way of life, especially if your not willing to stand up and lend a helping hand in the trans woman’s struggle to live a well rounded and happy life...
BLACK MADAM is not a murderer, God bless her... Her Work has helped Thousands...
I really enjoyed your forthcomingness in your essay;it's one that I'm all too familiar with. Like yourself my first sil visit was in N.Y. But because of a combination of my needle phobia and anxiety of being in a place that was completely unfamiliar to me at the time it created some minor complications during the pumping process, But I was determined, after that session it came under good advisement that I should for future appointments see our person in philly.Now that age seems to be playing a catch up game I'm now thinking of getting some minor touch up work soon.:) AnyHoo, again; I really enjoyed the openness of your essay.
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